Thoughts on Being Big

TulipTreeElm House Blog, tuliptree4 Comments

By Bee

The children have been talking a lot about being big or grown up, versus being the little babies that they were a week ago. 😉 It seems like this is being echoed at home, as several of you mentioned it in your responses to my “What’s New?” email.

Here are some unfiltered thoughts from the children! I hope you enjoy them!


Bee: I heard you guys talking about being big. What makes you big?

Child1: My self makes me big. But I am little too.

Child2: Yeah! I’m big! But maybe I am small.

Bee: You are feeling big and small. You said your self makes you big? What makes you little?

Child1: Seveah makes me little. She’s my sister.

Bee: I see. Your sister keeps you little. How do you feel about your little sister?

Child1: I feel. I feel… I feel Seveah. I sit by her and Mama.

Bee: You sit with her and Mama. Being a big brother is hard work. Sometimes it can be fun, and sometimes it can be frustrating. Sometimes it is very exciting!

Child1: I feel excited about lights. About Christmas lights!

Bee: Do you think your sister liked the lights?

Child1: Maybe yes. Maybe six times. But she is little.


Child1: I’m a big person.

Child2: I’m a big person too.

Child1: I’m a big person because I can talk.

Child2: Yeah. And me too.


A group of children are coming down the stairs. Child1 gets down first, after which she turns and says

Child1: “I am going to wait for all these people. Sometimes big people wait.”


Child1: “This is my penis. It’s because I am big.”

Bee: “Yup! That is your penis. You said you have it because you are big now. Was it there when you were little?”

Child1: “It’s good. It’s a good penis.”

Bee: “You sound really happy with it!”

Child1: “Yeah! It’s AMAZING!!!”

Bee attempts to hold her composure, but begins to laugh

Child1: “I’m cute.”

Bee guffaws


Child1: I like coffee. When I am big, I like coffee. When I was little, I didn’t like coffee. But now I am big and I like coffee. But I’m little too.


Child1: Where is this baby’s diaper??

Bee: I don’t know where that baby’s diaper is.

Child1: That baby needs a diaper.

Child2: That baby doesn’t need a diaper! She is getting bigger! She has a penis now!

Child1: Oh yeah! She has a penis now. She is bigger! Lets put her on the potty!


Child1: Bee, do you have underwears?

Bee: Yes, I own some underwear.

Child1: And you wear it because you are big?

Bee: Well, anyone can wear underwear, big or small.

Child1: And you pee in your underwear?

Bee: I mostly pee in the toilet. Sometimes if I laugh too much I might have an accident though. My body has to pee a lot, so I try not to hold it. That’s why I go to the bathroom many times a day, to take care of my body!

Child1: Yeah, cause you are big!!!


I didn’t realize the connecting themes until I had these all typed out, but from a cursory glance it seems like many of our friends are exploring the idea of being both big and small. The children are aware that they were once smaller than they are now, but they still aren’t as big as all the adults around them. They are wrestling with a feeling of personal growth that hasn’t fully come to fruition yet. For perhaps the first time in their lives, they are aware that they are a work in progress. That is a lot to explore!

It also seems like quite a few of our friends equate having a penis with being grown up! I’m curious about the root of this idea, and think it is interesting that several of the children share this idea, even though I haven’t heard them talking about it as a collective group.

The final commonality is that the children associate being big with using the toilet. This one I expected, but the other two were interesting surprises to me!


As always, please feel free to share any wonderings, comments, questions, or quotes about being big in the comments below!





4 Comments on “Thoughts on Being Big”

  1. Interesting exploration, Bee!

    I wonder if the penis/being big connection is related to potty training. That when you’re big, you use the toilet, your diaper comes off and all of a sudden, “whoa! look what was hiding in my diaper all this time!?”

  2. I hadn’t thought of that Jessica! I think that is a really interesting idea! I will update this blog, or write a more focused one, if the children give us any more clues about this idea of theirs. Thank you for chiming in!

  3. I love that you are noticing these trends and helping the kids explore their bodies safely and with confidence, Bee! Thanks for facilitating these wonderful conversations.

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